How to talk dirty and influence people

He is coming.... Are you Ready?

2007-01-12T13:31:00.000-05:00

He's just praying that you won't give him the information he needs. Its that time of year again, when one super bad ass, saves the world in a day, without taking a bathroom break. If they threw just one shot of jack taking a leak, I think I would probably Shit on myself. The show has had its ups and downs, but always keeps me coming back like a fat person to Hardees. Just in case you have never watched the show, (which is insane to me). Here is a little site that should let you know who this Jack Bauer Guy Really is.

Taken From Jack Bauer Facts
Top 24 Jack Bauer Facts...
Rating (out of 4)
3.30 Jack and Jill went up the hill. Only Jack came down. Jill was a fucking terrorist.
3.29 Jack Bauer could get off the Lost island in 24 hours.
3.29 If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
3.27 Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
3.26 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
3.22 The only reason you're conscious right now is because Jack Bauer doesn't want to carry you.
3.20 Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
3.19 There were originally five horsemen of the apocalypse. Jack Bauer said he would travel by foot.
3.18 They say you can't go a day without water, Jack Bauer has gone five seasons.
3.15 Jack Bauer sleeps with a gun under the pillow. But he could kill you with the pillow.
3.12 When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack found it and put it back.
3.11 When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack found it and put it back.
3.09 When life hands Jack Bauer Lemons, he kills Terrorists. Jack Bauer fuckin' hates lemonade.
3.08 As a boy, Jack Bauer interrogated his parents on Easter until they revealed the location and contents of each hidden egg.
3.07 Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
3.07 After running out of ammo, Jack stood in the line of fire, took 3 shots to the chest, and used them to reload.
3.05 Nostradamus once predicted in his journal: "In the century 21st, the one known as Jacques will be the savior of the world... five seasons in a row." Moments later, Jack Bauer knocked down the door, shot Nostradamus in the kneecaps, and yelled "WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR?!"
3.03 A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Minister walked into a bar... and Jack Bauer is going to find out why...
3.01 Superman has Jack Bauer pajamas.
3.01 Jack Bauer has no friends, because as a child when he would play cops and robbers, the robbers would all be interogated and killed.
3.01 Jack Bauer is the reason Waldo is hiding.
3.01 Jack Bauer has been to Mars. Thats why there's no life on Mars.
3.00 Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
3.00 On Jack Bauers Tax Returns, he has to claim the entire world as his dependants.

Zune Phone

2007-01-11T08:56:00.000-05:00

Who hasn't seen the Iphone...but this has everything that has... AND MORE!!!!

No Rice a Roni

2007-01-11T07:36:00.000-05:00

What a trip. First time to San Francisco, and i must say it was San Fran-tastic!!! Cara and I got to live it up in the SOMA district, walking more than a gym could do for us in a month. Though we didn't eat at too many delicious restaurants, we did have one of the best beers I think I have ever had. It was at a place called Thirsty Bear. Being a Micro Brewery they had all sorts of variety, but we ended up with the girliest of the girl beer, a Vanilla Beer. It so great though, not something I could drink every day but definitely something that when I think about it, my mouth waters... here are some pictures of the smooth ass trip..

San Francisco Trip

www.zombieportraits.com

2006-12-04T18:13:00.000-05:00

no one is reading this anyways...but check out this page...wow I am tempted to get one.....

www.zombieportraits.com

And I thought I knew about Rock

2006-11-08T14:51:00.000-05:00

Sometimes you just have to figure that someone can do it better than you. And well this guy does it better than most. From the hair, to attitude, to the skills on the axe, to his house, to the fog machine. Well you get the point. Words can not describe the joy I feel in my pants when I watch this.

Been a while, but this must be posted

2006-10-06T11:28:00.000-04:00

Wow when you thought the KFC bowl was gross, how bout this... found at the wonderful website Junkfood Blog

I think I am going to have to buy some of these just to do some "experiments"

Coming with the Hawtness!

2006-07-07T17:16:00.000-04:00

Okay seriously, this is weird, but look at these guys... and it might make your day a little brighter...There is a whole website of guys who look like this!!!!!

Check out the Hawtness

Don't Hassel the Hoff

2006-07-07T16:55:00.000-04:00

Seriously????? Is this a European thing? Can someone please go over to Europe (and Austraila) and take a poll on who is buying this?

A little bit Modest Mouse

2006-06-29T16:10:00.000-04:00

Shot in 1997 by indie filmmaker Rick Madsen, this 36 min documentary filmed during the recording of the Modest Mouse album "The Lonesome Crowded West" will never be released commercially. Artists interviewed for the film include Elliott Smith, Spencer Moody from The Murder City Devils, Doug Martsch of Built To Spill, Sam Coombs of Quasi and Calvin Johnson.

Then if that isn't enough, I actually found a video of Modest Mouse performing in front of Atlanta's own Criminal Records

The Revolution will be danced!

2006-04-07T12:54:00.000-04:00

OH and if this isn't enough for you, why don't you learn how to you can keep up with Carbone who is a master of this thing.

HOW TO MASTER DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION

Ever seen that crazy dance game in arcades? That's Dance Dance Revolution, and with a little practice, you can be a master at it. Here's how to dance your heart out!

Steps

BEGINNERS

Dance Dance Revolution

Choose your song wisely. Look at the number of "feet" displayed on a scale of 1 to 10 at the bottom of the screen. The higher number of "feet" the harder the song will be.
Recognize that different songs have various BPM (beats per minute). The higher the BPM, the faster (and thus potentially harder) the song will be. Determine what speed you are the best at. Some songs change BPM during the course of play. All of these factors are displayed on the screen where you select songs.
Vary your selection. If you pick the same song every time, it usually annoys other players. Only do this if you're brand-new to the game. To really improve once you start playing Light (yellow) and Standard (Pink) difficulty, you should play a larger variety of songs to learn new patterns.
Use your knees to bounce with the character on the screen, or as the lights flash on the machine. Once you've gotten that down and you've moved to Light, you can begin to actually dance along with the beat before you finalize your song selection.
Don't return to the middle! This is very important. The tutorial shows the character standing on the middle (metal) platform, but to play any song harder than about 3 feet, your "ready" stance should stand mainly on the Left and Right arrows. The game does NOT penalize you for stepping on an arrow if there isn't one on the screen; with this posture you'll be much more prepared for the arrow patterns.
Learn to shift your weight as you step. For instance, suppose you are given the steps "Right Right Right." The best way to do this is to keep your weight on your left foot, while tapping the right button three times with your right foot. This avoids the common beginner mistake of shifting one's weight onto the right foot after the first step, causing one to have to hop to hit the right button again, and often throwing one off balance. Similarly, suppose one is given the steps "Right Left Right." This is best done by "walking" on the arrows, shifting your weight to each step as you hit it. This avoids the mistake of keeping your weight on the right arrow the whole time, which would make it easy to tap the left button but would force you to hop to hit the last right button. So if you were given "Right Right Left Left Right" and you started with your weight on your left foot, you should do the following: tap the right arrow, step on the right arrow (shift weight), tap the left arrow, step on the left arrow (shift weight), and step on the right arrow. Most of the beginner songs consist of steps that can be done by some combination of "walking" from arrow to arrow, and tapping an arrow if that step is repeated, and these are the techniques you need to learn before you can do harder songs.
While other people are using the machine, if there's space for you, try to copy the steps they're doing. This will let you get practice without spending any money (or worrying about failing a song)!

STANDARD

Use speed multipliers. Hold down the main button when you select your song, and an options screen will be displayed. If you like your songs fast, do 2X. If you like your songs average/fast, do 1.5X. Some players frown on speed mods just as some players frown on using the bar for support. It is important to remember that speed mods and the bar are there for your assistance; try not to use them but don't make yourself suffer.
Learn the difference between the steps. 1/8 Steps are twice as fast as the "normal" beat of the song. (Say to yourself, "one and two and three and four and...") A common step pattern on Standard are three notes at double speed. (Think, "one and two," "three and four.") You'll definitely need to be off the middle of the pad to get these steps (see above). Try to listen to and use the rhythm of the song, and gradually you'll master it.
Work on mastering 1/16th notes. These are even faster than 1/8th notes and are usually packed tightly together on the screen. Using Speed Multipliers to spread them out will greatly help your ability to "read" their rhythm. (A straight run of 1/16th notes is counted "ONE-ie and ah TWO-ie and ah THREE-ie and ah FOUR-ie and ah," although you'll rarely see this pattern on Standard. Usually, what appears are groups of three 1/16th notes in a row. Count this pattern as, "ONE-ie and, TWO-ie and," etc.
Crossovers are steps where you either have to turn your body sideways or cross one leg over the other to successfully "walk" along the steps. For instance, if you must hit "Left Down Right Down Left Down Right Down Left ..." then you should switch feet, using your left foot to hit the left and right arrows and your right foot to hit the down arrow (or vice versa). This will require either crossing your legs or turning your whole body 90 degrees to the right (making the steps analogous to "Down Right Up Right Down Right Up Right Down..."). Crossovers are the first of the more sophisticated stances.
Galloping is where you well...gallop. It's rather like skipping forward. These are technically 1/16th notes, grouped 2 at a time. (Think, "ONE, ah TWO, ah THREE, ah FOUR." You only have to step on the beat and the "ah", like "RIGHT - - Right LEFT - - Left RIGHT ...") *** You jump in the air and once you land one foot, you land the other on the opposite arrow immediately afterward. TSUGARU APPLE MIX is a great song to master this. (DDR Extreme version only.)
Sometimes it's hard to see gallops in the middle of a stream of arrows. Using speed mods will make them easier to read, as will changing the noteskin to solo. The home version also has an option to use different colored noteskins, called Type2. These different colors making picking out gallops trivial.

EXPERTS

Progress to even harder songs. Once you're comfortable with a lot of Standard-difficulty songs, start doing some 6-foot Heavy songs. As you master the new moves that are required, you'll be able to move your way up to 8 footers, to 9, and then 10 eventually.
On really hard songs, using the bar behind you to balance can help a lot. However, most DDR players frown on this as a crutch. For Beginner, Light, and Standard, this really isn't required.
For your final song, try a hard song that you might not normally be able to finish. If you keep doing that, you will eventually be able to finish a new song, and increase your repertoire!
Try to learn some of the most complicated step patterns that you can do while "walking", or always switching feet. The song Rhythm and Police (4th mix) is an excellent one to learn slowly and work up - it contains most of the complicated step patterns that require no more than crossovers. The song Afronova (3rd Mix) is good for teaching more complicated stances, such as having to turn 90 degrees to the left to be able to hit "Left Up Right Left Down Right Left Up Right Left Down Right..."
Learn to use your heel as well as the ball of your foot. This technique is sometimes called playing flat footed. For instance, have the ball of your right foot on up, and the heel of your right foot on right. Now, assume you have the step pattern Up-Left-Right. Hit up with the ball of your right foot, left with whatever part of your left foot is easiest, and right with the heel of your foot. Since you move your feet a shorter distance, you expend less energy and move more quickly.

Tips

Challenge yourself. The only way you can get better is if you consistently attempt more challenging songs and levels. Always play songs that are hard (like 1 foot above your normal level) so you can get better at it and eventually jump up to the next foot.
For extra practice, buy the home version game for Xbox or PS2.
Don't be afraid to ask other players for advice. Most DDR players are nerdy and love helping out others to show off their amazing prowess at the game!
When Playing Dance Dance Revolution, use the arrows as a guide, and sometimes let your own intuition tell you when to step on the arrows according to the beat of the music. If you try to just time when the arrows reach the top, you'll never develop an enjoyable beat or be able to master the tricky rhythms that are in difficult Standard and Heavy songs. Instead, lead the arrows as they move up the screen. Where the judgement ("Great", "Perfect", "Miss", etc) appears is typically a good place to look.
On faster songs, try to lead the arrows, looking about half-way between the bottom of the screen where the arrows originate and the top where the step arrows are. This will teach you to predict based on the BPM of the song rather than on visual cues. This is a key concept.
If you are uncomfortable playing by yourself, bring a friend.
90 degree turns vs double steps: When there are LUR, LDR, RUL, or RDL combos, there are two ways to do them: (1) use the relative foot (i.e. left foot for left pad and right foot for right pad) for the first step and your other for the other two while your weight is on your first foot. This is used when you can move your legs fast enough to get the last two with one leg, but usually isn't used by experts. This turns out as L(L)-U(R)-R(R) (2) Use the opposite foot for the first step (ie left foot to right pad or right foot to left pad) and alternate feet for the other two. This ends up as L(R)-U(L)-R(R).

Warnings

Do not fall! As stupid as it sounds, I have seen people fall before because they couldn't balance on a machine. It is highly embarassing.
Make sure the socks you wear for the basic home-version pads won't cause you to slip. Sweat can also complicate the pad's surface. Always use common sense, and be careful not to disturb others around you!
Just like swimming, don't play DDR for about an hour after you eat or drink, unless it's a light snack or hydrating liquid (see below).

Things You'll Need

Comfortable Shoes
Money
Water (Or some other hydrating liquid)

Chuck Close

2006-03-26T14:55:00.000-05:00

Can't wait to see this. Its in Atlanta until June 18th. Luz dog turned me on to this guy, and the stuff that I have seen is pretty amazing

The Chronic - what? - cles of Narnia!!!

2006-03-26T14:38:00.000-05:00

Who doesn't like the "Lazy Sunday" digital short from SNL. It might possibly be the best thing that has happened to SNL since Will Ferrell. These guys are to blame.